Growing up, I’ve been taught that I need to be grateful for what I have—eat your dinner, as there are starving children in Africa; work hard in school, as you’re given an opportunity that many of your relatives don’t have; and of course the real zinger from the parents—when I was young, even to go to school, I had to walk in the snow—barefoot and uphills both ways—ok ok that last part might be just my exaggeration of the situation.  

Recently, I’ve also read so many articles on the benefits of gratitude: it relieves toxic emotions, it helps you sleep better, it puts you in a better mood, it improves your life in the bedroom…kidding on that one! Though in all fairness, if you’re happy and in a good mood, surely your love life improves too right?! The big question I have is how exactly should I practice gratitude? For example, should I just be thankful everytime I eat that I’m not a starving child nor do I live in Africa, should I start thanking specific people, or put grateful thoughts in a bottle and release into the ocean? Where should I actually start?  

Well fortunately yours truly has already tried out several gratitude practices and sharing some of my top picks, which I’ve found to be extremely practical, fun, and actionable—most of them borrowed from people much smarter than me—if you think I came up with them on my own--Sorry to disappoint you! 

Gratitude for the journey something took to get to you. Whether it’s the pair of jeans you’re currently wearing or the apple you ate in the morning, if you think about it—it took literally a village of people and their hard work for the item to get into your hands.  

Take, for example, one of my favorite items of enjoyment—wine. First, someone needs to plant the grape vine, but it takes at least 3 years for the vine to be ready to bear fruit for winemaking—during which laborers need to meticulous prune and train the vines and ensure the optimal amount of water. When the grapes are ready to picked, a group of people needs to get up at the crack of dawn to go harvest. Then between the crushing of the grapes, aging the wine and bottling, dozens more people have to put in their labor and love.  

Hold on—we're not done yet---what about the oak barrels that we age the wine in—some arborist had to plant the oak trees a long time ago, wait for it to grow up, chop down the wood and a carpenter or alike has to convert it into nice round barrels. Same goes for the wooden cork that seals the wine neatly for me to enjoy! Also, have you ever thought about the process it takes to produce a glass bottle? I certainly have not—it first involves collecting sand, limestone, cullet melted at high temperatures to form glass. Then a press and blow process is used to mold into a bottle shape.  

I’ll skip all the people and process involved for distribution of wine into consumer hands—the punchline is a whole lot of people are involved there too. The author AJ Jacobs who writes for Esquire magazine wanted to thank everyone that makes his morning coffee possible, and the list was a thousand people long!! It ranged from the barista who handed him the coffee, the truck driver who delivered the coffee bean, the inventor of the sleeve that protects the coffee from burning your end (apparently the sleeve is called a Zarf) to the woman who did pest control at the warehouse where the coffee beans are stored. When I think about the long journey of my wine I'm currently drinking--I now think the 25 mere buckaroos I paid is a total bargain! I won’t challenge you to what Mr. Jacobs did but next time you eat dinner, just take 30 seconds to recount a bit of gratitude for all the people that have made your meal possible—and as upshot, you will probably enjoy the meal a bit more too.  

Bottle small wins so you can be grateful later. I’ve noticed this strange phenomenon where I can receive 5 compliments and then one criticism, and the negative comment is the one I remember-- and the one where I needlessly torment myself with. This actually seems quite common amongst people—when something good happens to you, you get excited for a hot second and then moves on—but when a negative event happens, you dwell on it much longer and takes longer to bounce back—which brings me to my happiness jar (well used to be a jar and now it’s a box)! I make it a habit that when something good happens--like yesterday, I was able to put together a work presentation in record time (productivity queen!) or last week when a friend texted me to tell me she really appreciated my advice on something--I write those “happy” things on a small piece of paper and drop it into the jar. Then when I’m feeling down or just at the end of the month, I can go back and unbottle all those happy moments that I no doubt would have forgotten about by now. This way, I know that even if I’m having a crappy day, I still can relive some small wins—which instantly puts me in a better mood.  

Be grateful not only for good things that happen to you but for all the bad things that you’ve avoided. Sadly 1.25 million people pass away from car accidents every year—it seems only a statistic when it’s impersonal—and a sad statistic at that but you likely don’t give it much thought unless you are personally affected. In all honesty, every time you get out of a car safely into the comfort of your home, you should be thanking your lucky stars…but you don’t (neither do I)—but it’s a good habit to slowly start forming—don’t just be thankful you got a job promotion but flip it around—be thankful you didn’t get laid off. I know it seems counter to the name of the blog to ask you to think about things that are glass less than full—but in this case, thinking about them can make you happier. Take me earlier today—I said a small thank you after I got out of my elevator—that I wasn’t trapped inside—having recently been confined in an elevator with colleagues several months earlier, I can acutely remember the stress and therefore am extra grateful for not reliving the incident. Sidenote: my colleagues were all braver than me in the elevator—when the building attendant asked if we could wait for elevator maintenance company instead of calling the fire dept, they all insisted it was fine--I would have said that I’ve lost feeling in my left arm and right leg and needed to get out immediately! Of course, an hour later—by then—the oxygen in the elevator was indeed running critically low—we finally got rescued.   

Lastly—I am grateful for you—yes you my dear reader—if you’ve made it through my entire spiel, then I’m very lucky to have you as my reader—for whom I’m so happy to put my creative energy towards—until next time cheers to you and your good health.